I lost my 19 year old daughter November 6, 1995, so I've been there and done that!

Facing Facts:

The first fact: There's nothing to be done that could bring her back. Once this fact sinks in, it's time to look for ways to deal with what happened.

 Then these questions come to mind:
"If I rant and rave will it do any good?" Of course it won't help!
"If I complain and dwell on my losses will it help?" It certainly won't help! 
"If I spend my days crying a bucket full of tears, will it help?"Absolutely not!

Now it's time to evaluate the changes that must be faced:
I won't see her ever again (on earth).
I'll never see her graduate from college & be the Pediatrician she'd hoped to be.
I won't get the thrill of making her wedding gown.
There'll be no wedding.
She won't give me grand children to love, enjoy and watch grow up.
She won't be around any more, period!

But her love is eternal so it will remain with me always.

[It only took a matter of seconds for me to have those thought flash through my mind.]

And I knew, the worst thing I could do would be to feel sorry for myself. Therefore I made up my mind that I would not feel sorry for myself. I won't waste time and energy on self pity!

Instead of self pity, I thought about her dad, her fiancé, her siblings, her cousins, her grandmothers, her best friends, and classmates. Yes, I spent a lot of time grieving for them and their loss...

The more I keep my sympathy focused on others, the less I thought about myself.

One thing is for sure: When you experience a trauma God wants you to come to Him... come closer than ever before. It is the perfect time to give your mind, heart, and your whole life to the Lord.

Jesus can heal a broken heart but we have to let Him have all the pieces. So give Him your "all"... He wants a total commitment. Jesus wants to be your Savior, but He also desires to be the MASTER and the LORD of your life!

We humans really need HIM in control even though we don't realize this until we're at our wits end... Time of LOSS puts us at this place!

Therefore: After we loose a loved one we have a great opportunity for spiritual growth.

Ask God: "Lord what do you want to accomplish in me, through this human tragedy?" Beg God to draw you closer to Him than you've ever been before and to help you to find peace & joy. And ask Him to help YOU to TRUST His decision...

God loves each one of us more than we could ever comprehend. It doesn't matter if we are poor, rich, handsome or homely. It doesn't matter whether we're sitting in church, on a beach or sitting in a jail cell. What we did wrong or what we did right doesn't matter. He loves every one of His children just the same. He doesn't have favorites!

God has a PLAN for each one of us...

If we're willing God will mend and change our heart and literally turn our life around.

Then we will begin to fit into His PLAN for our life!

Then we can become one of His useful servants.

After we've gone through the devastation of LOSS we should be willing to help others. Helping others also helps bring more healing of our own emotions. Thus while helping others we GROW Spiritually and recover faster and more completely.

God will show us how to use our experiences as a means to reach out to others in trouble and distress. I can attest to this! I've been there, done that! [My poetry reveals much of my life.]

God had a purpose for my Mary's death. What the whole purpose was I'm not sure. But, I do know that He is using my experience to reach out to other hurting folks, for their sake and for His GLORY! I praise God for THAT! God is so good!

I am rejoicing because the hardships brought me closer to my Lord and Savior. I thank God that He didn't give up on me. He was there by my side, patiently waited for me to give Him control of my whole life. When I did, He turned my life around. And now I am useful to Him in His WORK. Therefore I'm most richly blessed as I shout His praises world wide!